Sanzo's comin' to town
by yumeneko
Summary: You better not pout, you better not swoon, you better not act stupid I'm tellin' you why... Sa-n-zo is comin' to town~! Oro! Here comes part 2! Elves in leather? I think so... SANZO!! OWARI!
1. Go To The West

_Sanzo's Comin' To Town!_

_by yumeneko_

_Disclaimers: As usual... Saiyuki is not mine._

_Note: Just for Christmas... *wink*_

===

"Genjo Sanzo!" Commanded the three Buddahs, "You have a new job to take care of..."

"What is it?" Sanzo asked.

"Take your followers and take this bag and deliver this to the children of the world. Santa Claus is sick." A bag of Christmas goodies appeared before Sanzo.

"Erm..." Sanzo sweatdropped as he looked at a life-sized doll of himself, "Do you have a list?"

"In fact, Santa has given you the list..."

"And so you're gonna wear that?" Gojyo laughed as Sanzo came into the room with the Santa costume.

"At least you don't get the beard..." Hakkai smiled, "How will you deliver these?"

"Easy..." Sanzo smiled evilly as he gave the three elf suits.

"Iyaaaa! Not tights!!" Goku screamed.

"I look hot in tights..." Gojyo purred.

"Kawaii!" Hakkai smiled as he wore his elf suit.

"Now, my elves... Let us deliver these gifts!" Sanzo commanded as he pointed towards the sunset, "Ho ho ho ho ho!"


	2. First Few Houses

_Sanzo's Comin' To Town!_

_by yumeneko_

_Disclaimers: As usual... Saiyuki is not mine._

_Note: Just for Christmas... *wink*_

===

"Cool!! Santa's here!! I didn't know Santa was a blonde!" One twin said with sparkly eyes as he saw Sanzo come down the chimney with his three elves.

"Santa! Santa! Santa!" The other twin pulled on Sanzo's sleeve, "I want my martian doggie!"

"I want my spaceship!" The first twin pulled on the other sleeve.

"Oooo... Being Santa's elf isn't so bad..." Goku smiled as he ate the cookies.

"I agree..." Gojyo smiled as he drank the milk.

"Hakkai!" Sanzo bellowed out, obviously ticked off.

"Hai, Sanzo... I mean... Santa?" replied the ever-smiling Hakkai.

"Those gifts are impossible!" Sanzo whispered.

Hakkai looked at the martian dog and the spaceship he pulled out and commented, "Ehh? Then, what are these doing in the bag?"

"I should have know what that bag was capable of..." Sanzo sweat dropped.

"To the next house!"

"SANZO!!" Two girls mobbed Sanzo as he came out of the chimney.

"Hakkai!! Tasukete yo!!" Sanzo grabbed on Hakkai's leg.

"Hai, Sanzo..." Hakkai pulled out the life-sized Sanzo doll out of the bag and threw it towards the rabid fans. The girls chased after it, allowing the blond monk and his elves to escape the wretched house of rabid Sanzo fangirls.

"I'm pooped... May the next house be more calm..."


	3. Sitting on Laps

_Sanzo's Comin' To Town!_

_by yumeneko_

_Disclaimers: As usual... Saiyuki is not mine._

_Note: Just for Christmas... *wink*_

===

"Why does our job have to be so stupid..." Sanzo sweatdropped as kids sat on his lap asking for gifts one after the other. A very plump guy came up the stage and sat, or should I say dropped, into Sanzo's lap. Sanzo's face turned into a shocking array of colors due to how heavy this boy was. The boy stayed for a half-hour on Sanzo's lap reciting names of food that made Goku salivate...

And finally, much to Sanzo's dismay... 

"Oh~! That ain't Santa! It's HAGE SANZO!" Lirin pointed at Sanzo, "Let's fight!"

"Goku..." Sanzo and Gojyo looked at the younger elf.

"Naze....." Goku wailed.

Suddenly, there was a spotlight in the center of the scene and Hakkai the angel decended from the sky holding a banner saying, "Peace And Goodwill To All Man and Demonkind"

"He's got a point there..." Kougaiji smiled.

"Onii-chan! I wanna sit on Sanzo's lap!" Lirin pleaded and Kougaiji gave the go-ahead. Lirin jumped on Sanzo's lap and cheered, "Ooooo!  I want this nikuman, and that flavored nikuman, and that other type of nikuman..." And the list went on...

"My lap hurts... Hakkai, what's our next destination?"

"Schwartz and Weiss... Um... Opassa Beach... Alexandria... these are wierd places, Sanzo..."   


	4. Weiss? Schwartz?

_Sanzo's Comin' To Town!_

_by yumeneko_

_Disclaimers: As usual... Saiyuki is not mine. Neither is Weiss Kreuz, Rurouni Kenshin, Chrono Cross or Final Fantasy 9._

_Note: Just for Christmas... *wink*_

===

"When will Santa come?" Omi asked Ken for the 100th time.

"Just wait..." Ken answered for the 100th time. Then finally, after waiting, someone came down their chimney.

"SANTA!" Omi cheered, "I want my brand new laptop! And that brand new software! Oh! And a new list of viruses!"

"First a hyper Lirin... Now a hyper computer fanatic... What is this hyper world coming to?" Sanzo sweatdropped.

"I where's my brand new soccer ball?" Ken tugged Sanzo's sleeve and pouted.

"Attack the bag! I want my new bottle of conditioner!!" Yohji proposed. But unfortunately, Hakkai blocked them off with his kikou.

"Now, now... No grabbing of gifts without Sanzo's permission..." Hakkai calmly told the assassins with an ear to ear smile, "Santa... would you please come here and give these boys their gifts?" Sanzo came over to the bag and took out their gifts. The assassins smiled and their eyes twinkled with glee.

"Yes!! I can hack better now!"

"I love you, Santa!"

"For my beautiful hair..."

"Hmm... Nice blade... Good for killing..."

"OK..." Gojyo scratched his head, "What's next?"

"To these people called Schwartz..." Hakkai looked at his companions.

"Off we go then! I wanna get this over with..." Sanzo rambled.

At the Schwartz villa, Farfie watched the chimney.

"What are you waiting for?" Nagi asked the insane Irishman.

"I wanna kill Santa, 'cause it hurts God." He replied.

"No fair! I wanna get my Christmas gift! I love the day of free stuff!" Brad protested. 

"I want hair gel..." Schuldig whined.

"But can't I kill him??" Farfie shook the German.

"After we get our gifts..." Schuldig sighed. That made Farfie jump around like a hyper bunny.

Down the chimney Sanzo went with his three elves. "Hohoho..." He grimly bellowed. The boys of Schwartz tackled him down and rose back up with their presents.

"He's all yours now, Farf..." Brad grinned broadly.

"I hurt God..." Sanzo pointed his gun at the psyco.

"Goodie!! I'm not alone!" Farfie hugged Sanzo.


	5. Rally Ho! FF9 and Chrono Cross!

_Sanzo's Comin' To Town!_

_by yumeneko_

_Disclaimers: As usual... Saiyuki is not mine. Neither is Weiss Kreuz, Rurouni Kenshin, Chrono Cross or Final Fantasy 9._

_Note: Just for Christmas... *wink*_

===

"Ehh? How did we get here??" Hakkai scratched his head as the four dropped into the S.S. Invincible.

"Look, mates! It's Santa!" Kid tackled Sanzo.

"Where's my new frying pan!" 

"And my dentures!"

"And my shiny new bell!" Pip piped up.

"Let's get outta here... Now." Sanzo threw his bag to divert their attention.

"With 40+ characters, we'd better run for it!" Gojyo sweatdropped.

"Meri Kurisumasu!" Goku cheerfully greeted as they escaped.

The four ended up in a rebuilt Alexandria. Unfortunately, Eiko kicked Sanzo and demanded her new ribbon. Sanzo, pissed off, threatened to kill her. But unluckily, the four were hit by Fenrir. 

"ITAI DA~!" Goku wailed as they sailed though the air.

"Oh well... Let's see where we're going to..." Hakkai smiled, "Oh! We're headed back to Changan..."

"Great..." Gojyo moaned just before impact with the ground.

"Amazing how we are able to survive that..." Hakkai moaned.

"Hakkai... You're talking too much..." Sanzo calmly said.

"I love Christmas..." Goku gleefuly said.

"Where are the babes sporting those mini-skirts..." Gojyo whined.

"Oro... What are these four doing here?" Kenshin poked Sanzo's head with a stick.


	6. Lost in Rurouni Kenshin

_Sanzo's Comin' To Town!_

_by yumeneko_

_Disclaimers: As usual... Saiyuki is not mine. Neither is Weiss Kreuz, Rurouni Kenshin, Chrono Cross or Final Fantasy 9._

_Note: Just for Christmas... *wink*_

===

"Welcome to Edo!" Kaoru welcomed Santa Sanzo and his three elves.

"Where are our gifts!!" Yahiko demanded.

"Here we go again..." Hakkai sweatdropped.

"Let's make a run for it!" Gojyo panicked.

"I hate being Santa..." Sanzo complained as he threw the bag of presents and ran as fast as he could go.

Soon, the four ended up in the middle of a forest.

"Now what?" Goku whined.

"We must find a way to get back to Changan..." Hakkai pondered. From the corner of his eye, he was able to spot a small quiet house, "Why don't we go into that house?"

"There might be another violent Santa hunter in there..." Sanzo grumbled.

"It's quiet..." Hakkai considered.

"Well then, it's better than camping outside..." Gojyo shrugged and walked towards the house. He knocked on the front door and he heard a voice of a small girl.

"The door's open..."

Gojyo sighed and opened the door, the house was nearly bare except for a few pieces of furniture. A small Christmas tree was set up in one corner, without a single decoration. He looked for the young girl and found her on the couch wrapped up in a blanket.

"Oi... It's okay. There's no one here but a small girl."

"I have a name, y'know!" The small girl angrily said.

"Then what is your name?" 

"Tokiko..."

"Cute name. Where are your parents?"

"Gone... They went to heaven a long time ago."

"I'm sorry..."

"Well then, you guys must be hungry! There's food in the pantry..." Tokiko said with a smile.

"Itadakimasu!!" Goku ran towards the kitchen.

"So, Tokiko-chan... Why don't you move?" Hakkai asked Tokiko.


	7. Angel

_Sanzo's Comin' To Town!_

_by yumeneko_

_Disclaimers: As usual... Saiyuki is not mine. Neither is Weiss Kreuz, Rurouni Kenshin, Chrono Cross or Final Fantasy 9._

_Note: Just for Christmas... *wink*_

===

"I don't wanna tell..." Tokiko looked back to her hands. Surprisingly, Gojyo took them and looked into her blue eyes.

"You can tell us..."

"Well then..." Tokiko removed the blanket covering her, exposing her deformed legs. they were stiff and frail. Hakkai's eyes widened at the deformity and he covered his mouth with his hand.

"Isn't it painful?" He asked.

"It isn't... I was born like this..." Tokiko sighed, "I was never able to walk. So my papa carried me everywhere. I guess it was my fault that he died..."

"It wasn't your fault. He sacrificed his life to keep you alive. Be thankful you are." Sanzo spoke up.

"Sanzo..." Hakkai closed his eyes, "I have faith in what you say... Just like what our loved ones did to bring us to this path... Kanan died."

"Komyo died."

"My mother died."

"But who died in my past?" Goku asked.

"I don't know who has died..." Tokiko piped up, "But when one dies, it is for the good of others."

"It is the ultimate sacrifice..." Gojyo sighed.

"It was the ultimate fear..." Hakkai looked up.

"But it was the ultimate Christmas gift..." Sanzo turned to Tokiko, "The gift your father has given you was more precious than all the gifts this Christmas time."

"That was a coincidence..." Tokiko smiled, "He died on Christmas day..."

"Well then," Sanzo walked towards the door, "Let's go back to Changan..."

"But how do we get there?" Hakkai asked. And a blinding light washed over the four of them. When the flash subsided, in place of Tokiko, there stood a beautiful angel.

"I will bring you back to Changan," The angel smiled, "Goes to show that even a corrupt monk has a place in his heart for his people..." And the light shone again.

As it subsided, the four found themselves in the room where this whole ruckus started. 


	8. Changan And Mistletoe

_Sanzo's Comin' To Town!_

_by yumeneko_

_Disclaimers: As usual... Saiyuki is not mine. Neither is Weiss Kreuz, Rurouni Kenshin, Chrono Cross or Final Fantasy 9._

_Note: Just for Christmas... *wink*_

===

The snow fell on the grounds of Changan that wintery Christmas day. Hakkai walked into Sanzo's room with mugs of hot chocolate. He sat beside the monk on the bed.

"Heiwa desu ne? Sanzo..."

Sanzo smiled as he accepted the mug of hot chocolate, "Hakkai... Do you remember what I had said to Tokiko?"

"I remember, Sanzo..."

"What kind of sacrifice have we made?"

"You sacrificed your life to save us..."

"But you made a sacrifice as hideous as mine... You risked killing yourself to protect us... You even worked so hard to keep me alive." Sanzo looked into his mug.

"But we'd never die, would we, Sanzo?"

"Perhaps... But we are all just mortal. We will just die."

"Why do we live to die in the end?"

"Everything has an end, Hakkai."

"Yes... But what about this thing called love?"

"Love?" Sanzo paused for a while, "I don't know how strong is it, but I don't even know if it would die..."

"You should know... Because you should know why I had risked my life to keep you alive..." Hakkai's gaze met Sanzo's.

"I know." Sanzo held Hakkai's hand, "You did it because you didn't want anyone of us to die... You didn't want anyone to die."

"I love you..." Hakkai smiled, "The impact of these words are so strong."

"I understand." Sanzo held Hakkai's hands tighter, "And I don't want to be weak. I don't want to show the world that I am not strong enough to protect the people I care for."

"You are strong..." Hakkai smiled, "We survived almost everything, right?"

"Yeah... I guess you're right."

Unexpectedly, Hakkai kissed Sanzo. Sanzo blushed a deep red, "What was that for?"

"Just my little Christmas gift to you..." Hakkai smiled, "Merry Christmas, Sanzo..."

Unknown to the two, a certain Gojyo hung a mistletoe earlier in Sanzo's room.

"Oh, look! It's a mistletoe!" Sanzo pointed up, causing Hakkai to look up as well. As Hakkai looked at the mistletoe, Sanzo gave him a peck on the cheek.

"Ha ha... those lovebirds... Now I can go chase the ladies..." Gojyo left the scene.

~Paato 1 no Owari~

I shall continue this ruckus!! There is part 2!!


	9. Part 2! Here goes Slam Dunk

_Sanzo's Comin' To Town!_

_by yumeneko_

_Disclaimers: As usual... Saiyuki is not mine. Neither is Slam Dunk, Yami No Matsuei, Gravitation, et al..._

_Note: Just for Christmas... *wink*_

===

PART 2

"Okay now! Is this ruckus over yet?" Gojyo asked the all-knowing Sanzo.

"No it's not, you idiot..." Sanzo grumbled, "Christmas isn't over yet..."

"Our next destination is the Akagi household!" Hakkai cheerfully said.

"You're awfully cheerful for an elf wearing tights..." Gojyo sweatdropped at the tight-wearing Hakkai.

"Actually, I just heard that they're changing the tights to tight leather..." Hakkai said.

"Tight leather..."

"But of course Sanzo's still Santa..."

"NO! I want leather!"

Hakkai threw the tight leather elf costumes to Goku and Gojyo as they hovered over the house.

"Well then, time to go down the chimney!" Hakkai jumped into the chimney. Sanzo and the others followed.

"Oi! Look! It's Santa!"

===

After 10 minutes... Sanzo and the leather-wearing elves popped out of the chimney.

"That was tough."

"I'm stiff and hungry..."

"At least those gorrilas there were smarter than you!"

"Yare, yare... Our next destination is... the Makai..." Hakkai lit a flashlight under his face.

"Ooooo... Scary..." Goku chilled.


	10. GRAND FINALE!

_Sanzo's Comin' To Town!_

_by yumeneko_

_Disclaimers: As usual... Saiyuki is not mine. Neither is Slam Dunk, Yami No Matsuei, Gravitation, et al..._

_Note: Just for Christmas... *wink*_

===

And so our heroes go to Makai, the demon world of Yu Yu Hakusho, they were tackled by Kurama.

"Arg!!" Sanzo struggled to get out of Kurama's grip.

"Gimme my Hiei plushie!!" He demanded.

In order to save Sanzo's life, Hakkai gave him the plushie. He watched as the kitsune ran away cuddling the plushie.

"Now that's over... Can we kill this guy..." Gojyo sweatdropped due to a big, huge, scary, creature chewing him up. Sanzo fired his gun and Gojyo dropped, wet with hot saliva.

"I wanted to be hot and wet, but this is not how I planned it to be..."

"Anyway, off to..." Hakkai paused in mid-sentence, "Where are we going to again?"

"I wanna watch Bad Luck preform!"

"Then Bad Luck it is!"

And off they flew...

===

Meanwhile... Shuichi sang, "All I want for Christmas is my dear Yuki, dear Yuki, dear Yuki..."

===

A/N: SHORT! Here we go with some replies...

_From: Sakura (lazy to log in)()_

_Great!! I like it! But I dun like when Hakkai and Sanzo meet up! I'm not jealous or something but I dun like boy with a boy! (gay) No offense, though! But better think of positive reviews! I'll read the christmas part or I'll get burp up reading romantic gays!_

Sanzo: Baka Neko! The next time you write yaoi, you must put up a warning!! *hits Hibi-chan's head a lot*

Hakkai: Yare, yare... Due to the shortage of ladies in the scene and due to watching Still Time...

Hibi: Wheeeeeee!! Yaoi scenes in Still Time!! Remember the opening song where Sanzo and Hakkai were chained to each other?

Sanzo and Hakkai: She's a maniac...

Sanzo: And besides that, she's a rabid yaoi fangirl... *hits Hibi's head some more*

Hakkai: None of her Saiyuki fics are free of the pairing...

Sanzo: Baka Gojyo... Hanging mistletoe on my head...

Hakkai: Yare, yare...

Hibi: I am INSANE!! *Goes next to Farfie* Did you know that being insane hurts God?

Farfie: Welcome to the club! *hands Hibi a straitjacket*

_From: jashuang (http://www.fanfiction.net/profile.php?userid=284403)_

_*sniff* i wanted gojyo to be beaten up by akagi...._

Hibi: Hmm... Good thinking... Let's put that in the finale...

Gojyo: Do you always think of ways to torture me!

Hibi: Good point... *tortures Gojyo with a feather*

_From: Sacred Bloodred RoseTear (http://www.fanfiction.net/profile.php?userid=167461)_

_Haha...now they're wearing tight leather!! ^O^_

Goku: It's itchy...

_From: MisLnk (http://www.fanfiction.net/profile.php?userid=291788)_

_HAHA...why did it turn from funny to romantic to funny again? but anyway, loved your xmas fic!_

Hibi: Nah... we just wanted some holiday spirit... Don't worry, the finale will make you fall off whatever you're sitting on...

Hakkai: *falls off chair*

_From: Fall()_

_Oi Hibiemi-chan, have I told you this was funny? *giggles like the mad fangirl that she is* Can't the Sanzo-ikkou-cum-Santa-and-elves pay a visit to...let's say, Gundam Wing, Fushigi Yugi, EVA, Slam Dunk, YnM, Gravitation, even erm, YYH? Heheh ^____^_

You are getting your request, Fall-san ^.^ Although I can't do away with EVA or Gundam... Grav and FY? Piece of cake! 


End file.
